Anzio

Anzio reminds me of being a junior in high school: I sort of knew what I wanted to do with my life, but I sort of didn't.  I was at a crossroads, between being a teenager and being... an older teenager.  Anzio is a lot like that.  On the one hand, it wants to be a grand, epic war movie (sort of like the earlier Sands of Iwo Jima or The Longest Day or the later A Bridge Too Far and Saving Private Ryan), but seems like a smaller film (like Beach Red or The Big Red One).  In most respects, it is a pretty conventional film for its era (it was released in 1968), but seems to be slightly more liberal/anti-war than other films (again, it came out in 1968, at the height of American involvement in the Vietnam War), to the extent that it is more like the rather unconventional The Dirty Dozen (released the year before) than the very conventional The Green Berets (released the same year as Anzio).  The story is simple enough: during WWII, a large force of U.S. Army Rangers advancing towards Rome are wiped out and captured during the Battle of Cisterna, leaving only about half a dozen surviving, free men, including war correspondent Dick Ennis (Robert Mitchum).  After the battle, the men must try to make it back to Allied lines safely.  The acting here is reasonable (especially from Peter Falk), and the dialogue seems OK.  The film can be a little weird at times (while many men are shot during the course of the movie, there is no blood - except for one shooting, which results in a fairly jarring spray of red from the wound).  The color palette used for the film is refreshing - instead of the dull colors used in some war films, we get bright, vivid colors.

While by no means a bad movie, Anzio seems a little shabby.  This is one of the few movies for which a remake seems like a pretty good idea.

Rating: 69/100

Django Unchained

While Pulp Fiction will always be Quentin Tarantino's masterpiece, his latest effort, Django Unchained, is certainly a close second - very, very close.  It was only a matter of time before Tarantino turned his attention to the western, and, as always, Tarantino has managed to make the genre his own.  More of a "Southern" than a western (after all, it does take place in the American South), Django Unchained may very well be the best western ever made.

Set in 1858, Django Unchained follows ex-slave Django (Jamie Foxx) and dentist-turned-bounty hunter Dr. King Schultz (Christoph Waltz) as they attempt to track down a trio of prime targets.  That is not the main plot.  The main plot is their quest to buy back Django's wife, Broomhilda (Kerry Washington), from her owner, plantation owner Calvin J. Candie (Leonardo DiCaprio) - a task easier said than done.  Tarantino's hallmarks of a strong story, excellent dialogue, and spot-on casting are all evident from the get-go.  With Samuel L. Jackson co-starring, and Jonah Hill, Robert Carradine, Tarantino himself, and even Franco Nero (who starred in the mostly-unrelated 1966 spaghetti western Django) all making appearances, the film has everything going for it - and that's just the tip of the iceberg.

One of the most notable things about this film is, as with all Tarantino films, the dialogue - it's eloquent, profane (although not as much as Tarantino's other films), and downright hilarious (the scene with the trackers, including Carradine and Hill, gets more laughs than many comedies have in their duration).  The blood is red, and spurts out from wounds as if real squibs (as in, honest-to-God squibs using dynamite, like in the days of The Wild Bunch) were used, and not that crappy CGI blood seen in some more recent films.

Another thing I really liked about this film is Samuel L. Jackson.  Now, I'm a pretty big Jackson fan, but his performance here is just something else.  It reminds me heavily of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks.  He hits all the right notes at the right moments, and is just a massive delight to watch.  It's a shame he doesn't get as much screen time as his fellow thespians, though - his character is deliciously evil and hilarious.

Okay, review's over.  Get off your lazy ass and go to the nearest theater that's showing Django Unchained.  Veet, veet!

Rating: 105/100 (it broke the rating scale)

Seven Psychopaths

Martin McDonagh must be a huge Quentin Tarantino fan, because his movie Seven Psychopaths feels quite a lot like a Tarantino film.  When I first saw the preview for it, I immediately thought of Pulp Fiction.  The actual movie really shows its Tarantino roots, but McDonagh steers the movie in its own direction.

Marty (Colin Farrell) is a screenwriter trying to complete his latest script, titled Seven Psychopaths.  His best friend, Billy Bickle (Sam Rockwell), kidnaps dogs for a living with his friend Hans (Christopher Walken), and then return the dogs to their owners to collect the reward money.  The Shih Tzu really hits the fan, however, when Billy and Hans kidnap Bonnie, the beloved dog of gangster Charlie (Woody Harrelson), forcing Billy, Marty, and Hans to get the hell out of Dodge for a while.  To pass time, they work on Marty's screenplay.  The psychopaths include a man who used to be in the Viet Cong, a couple that murdered murderers, and even a Quaker (who probably has the best story of them all).  Overall, the characters (both in the movie proper and Marty's screenplay) are very intriguing, and the film itself tends to be very self-referential.  Walken is absolutely brilliant as Hans, while Rockwell as Billy is absolutely insane.

Offbeat, unpredictable, and very entertaining, Seven Psychopaths is a difficult movie to classify.  It's like Pulp Fiction, but with a little more action/gunplay.  The only other movie that I can really offer up for comparison is The Big Lebowski (you'd have to watch both Lebowski and Psychopaths to understand).  This is definitely one movie that isn't to be missed.

Rating: 91/100

Dogma

"Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in next to soccer."
Kevin Smith is generally known for making vulgar, obnoxious movies that are full of heart.  Dogma is... a vulgar, obnoxious movie that is full of heart, but is also a clever religious satire.  While not as hilarious as his other films (such as Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back), Dogma is pretty funny, and quite compelling, too.  The story is clear (and quite complex), the characters are distinct and likeable, and the acting is excellent.  Who else but Kevin Smith could make a story about two fallen angels' attempt to get back into Heaven (having been expelled for being drunk on the job long, long ago) and the attempts of average woman Bethany Sloane (an abortion clinic worker) and her ragtag band of holy misfits (including Jay and Silent Bob, who are apparently prophets) into a crass comedy?  The real-life bromance between Matt Damon and Ben Affleck is highly evident here, and really adds depth to their characters (Loki [a grigori] and Bartleby [the former Angel of Death], respectively).  In addition to Damon and Affleck, the cast includes Jason Mewes and Smith himself (as Jay and Silent Bob, of course), George Carlin (in the ironic role of a Catholic priest*), Chris Rock, Jason Lee, Alanis Morissette, Linda Fiorentino, Salma Hayek, and Alan Rickman round out the cast.  Oh, and a certain someone important gets put into a coma (not telling you who though).

Rating: 86/100

"Beautiful, naked, big-tittied women just don't fall out of the sky."

*I get the feeling that, were this movie made today, there would be some altar boy jokes.

The Lost Battalion

Relatively decent made-for-TV movie based on the true story of a unit of the United States Army that was surrounded by German forces in the Argonne Forest in France during the Meuse-Argonne Offensive in 1918 (during World War I, obviously).  The film is relatively historically accurate (the American soldiers, for instance are seen using M1917 Enfield rifles, which were more common than the standard-issue M1903 Springfield), although there are probably a number of goofs (I'm not an expert on the battle, so I wouldn't know for certain what they are).  Overall, though, the film is adequate: adequate script, adequate directing, adequate acting, good sets, costumes, and armaments.  Oh, and the film doesn't drag on too long, and the gunshot effects (specifically the blood that squirts out of wounds) gives a certain cinematic flair that harkens back to movies like Bullitt and The Wild Bunch.  A good watch if you like war movies or historical dramas, but nothing to write home about.

Rating: 70/100

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

I love Will Ferrell.  He's a terrific actor, and extremely funny - qualities which are prominently displayed in Anchorman.  Ron Burgundy (Ferrell) is the anchorman of a local San Diego news station.  However, his world gets turned upside down with the arrival of a sexy new reporter (Christina Applegate), with whom Burgundy soon falls in love (obviously).  And of course, there's normal news anchor stuff, like Ron's relationship with Baxter (his dog), his news team's rivalry with other San Diego news teams (which culminates in one of the movie's most hilarious/most violent moments), and the quirkiness of the rest of Ron's news team (including Paul Rudd and, most notably, Steve Carrell as a dimwitted weatherman).

While not a movie for everyone (i.e. people who don't like Will Ferrell will absolutely hate it), Anchorman is a wonderful film, and is easily one of Ferrell's most memorable.

Rating: 90/100

The Expendables 2

There's only one thing to do when you make a successful movie that is the ultimate love letter to action movies: do it again!  The Expendables 2 is pretty much The Expendables all over again: Barney Ross (Stallone) and co. work for Mr. Church (Bruce Willis), and go and shoot people and blow stuff up.  The main difference this time around is the cast: Bruce Willis and Ahnold (in the role of Trench) get bigger roles, and Chuck Norris joins in on the fun (for better or for worse).  There's also newcomers Maggie (Yu Nan), a Chinese tech genius (and all-around badass) who Mr. Church sends along with Barney's team to retrieve some valuable data, and Billy the Kid (Liam Hemsworth), a crackerjack young sniper who served with the U.S. Army in Afghanistan.  Jean-Claude Van Damme plays a cold, ruthless, possibly Russian villain.  I honestly don't know why they even bothered with a plot; it's basically porn (something which Stallone should be very familiar with) for action-movie junkies.  Basically, the movie is a cacophony of blood spurts, fiery explosions, gunfire, and one-liners, with a tank thrown in for good measure.

This movie isn't high art; it's good, violent fun.  It's cliched, and it's proud of that fact.  The score tells you how to feel (although the poppy oldies music and classic rock are rather jarring, albeit awesome), the bad guys are piss-poor shots (they must have gone to the Imperial Stormtrooper Marksman Academy) and the good guys never run out of bullets when they're mowing down mooks (except when they run out for the sake of dramatic tension).  Oh, and there's a Chuck Norris fact, as well as references to many of the stars' past films (including Rambo, Terminator, Die Hard, and Good Guys Wear Black).  Still, I have a few problems with this movie:

-The profanity.  Namely, there's very, very little (even compared to the first Expendables movie, which didn't have all that much to begin with).  Nobody drops the f-bomb (supposedly because of Chuck Norris being a conservative Christian and all that crap*), even Bruce Willis (if you've seen Die Hard, you'll understand).
-Jet Li.  He only appears at the beginning of the movie before returning to China.  It's kind of a letdown.
-CGI blood.  For God's sake, use packets filled with red dye, not that fake-looking computer-generated crap.
-All the badasses who didn't appear in the film, but should have (I'll list them in a moment).

Other than that, I really liked this movie.

Rating: 78/100

And now, the list of people not appearing in this movie:
-Clint Eastwood (although I've heard that Stallone wants him for Expendables 3)
-Justin Bieber (I thought it would be cool to see him get killed in a very gruesome way)
-Jackie Chan
-Lee Marvin (he's dead)
-Bruce Lee (he's dead, but I'm pretty sure he can come back to life, sort of like Jesus)
-John Wayne (again, dead)
-William Holden (dead)
-Ernest Borgnine (dead, and just recently, to boot)
-Jim Brown
-Will Smith
-Matt Damon
-Nicolas Cage (who Stallone actually tried to get in the movie)
-Antonio Banderas (offered a role, but had to turn it down due to prior commitments)
-Taylor Lautner (a.k.a. the only actor from Twilight that I actually like/has any talent)(Stallone apparently considered him for the role that went to Hemsworth)
-Lucy Liu
-Samuel L. Jackson
-David Carradine (dead... but what a way to go!)
-Mark Hamill

*Chuck Norris DID appear in Dodgeball, which had the word (used, in fact, to describe Mr. Norris himself), so I have no idea why he was so anal about swearing in this movie.

The Campaign

I like Will Ferrell.  I like Zach Galifianakis.  I was thrilled to learn that they would be working together on a movie.  The Campaign lives up to expectations - and then some.  While it may appear to the untrained eye as a stupid, simplistic, crude, and vulgar depiction of American politics, it's actually... a stupid, simplistic, crude, and vulgar depiction of American politics.  It's also hilarious, and right on target.  Ferrell and Galifianakis (yes, I had to look up how to spell his name) are perfect as candidates for the U.S. Congress, with Galifianakis stealing the show as the bizarre Marty Huggins.  The film, in spite of its crudeness, was also very touching,* and very timely as well (seeing as how we are about to choose between Obama and Rmoney [sorry, I meant "Romney"] - or, as I like to call them, Barack Obama and Raging Rich Asshole).  Even if you don't like Will Ferrell, you can still enjoy this movie (even my mother, who is not a fan of the man, thought the movie was actually pretty good).  So what if it's not All the President's Men?  It doesn't need to be - it just needs to be good.  And it's damned good.

Rating: 82/100


*I'm serious (actually, I'm Brandon, but I'm also not joking).

Killer Joe

For quite a while now, I've believed that Matthew McConaughey is an underrated actor.  Just because someone is in a lot of fluffy crowd-pleasers doesn't mean that they can't act.  I first opened my eyes to McConaughey when I saw Tropic Thunder, and my belief was further reinforced through A Time to Kill.  But it's Killer Joe that really seals the deal.  Here, McConaughey plays "Killer" Joe Cooper, a Texas cop (actually, a detective with the Dallas Police Department) who has a side business: he kills people.  When a young man (Emile Hirsch) needs money to pay off some drug debts, he comes up with a crazy idea: have his mother killed, and collect her life insurance money (which is apparently $50,000).  His white trash family (who probably define white trash) - father, sister, and stepmother - think it's a good idea (the mother is apparently a real bitch), and they hire none other than Killer Joe himself to do the dirty deed.  He demands $25,000 upfront - which can't be paid.  Instead, he takes collateral, in the form of little sister Dottie (who is portrayed as possibly being underage - I really can't tell how old she's supposed to be).  And here lies the point where the feces impact the fan.
The film contains many, many uncomfortable moments (I found myself shifting around in my seat quite often - something which I do not normally do at the movies), and McConaughey's performance sent chills down my spine (the theater I went to, while very, very nice, was also rather warm).  I must say, McConaughey's performance ranks as one of the best that I've ever seen - and I've seen some damn good acting in my life.  While the movie certainly earns its NC-17 rating (it really is NOT for everyone), it really isn't a bad movie at all.  Directed by William Friedkin (best known for The Exorcist and The French Connection back in the 1970s, the latter of which netted him an Oscar for Best Director) and based on a play by Pulitzer Prize winner Tracy Letts, Killer Joe is one of the most chilling, twisted, disturbing films I have ever laid eyes on - and also one of the best.

Rating: 99/100

Von Richtofen and Brown

Adequate Roger Corman flick about air combat during World War I.  The movie mainly focuses on Manfred von Richtofen (a.k.a. the "Red Baron," who, with 80 confirmed kills, was the highest-scoring pilot during the war) and Roy Brown - a Canadian ace* flying with Britain's Royal Flying Corps/Royal Air Force who supposedly killed the Baron in combat (in reality, it was probably an Australian soldier who fired the fatal bullet).  The acting isn't anything to crow about (everyone speaks English, and individual characters, save for Brown, are difficult to pick out), and there are many, many glaring historical errors.  The flying sequences are the best thing about the film, and feature authentic aircraft (and, in some cases, replicas).  No real surprises, but the film is palatable.

Rating: 70/100

*An "ace" is generally defined as a pilot who has shot down five or more enemy aircraft in combat.  This number varied during World War I, but by the end of the war, the number was generally five.  The highest-scoring ace of all time is Erich Hartmann, a German pilot during World War II with a whopping 352 aerial victories (in second place is fellow German Gerhard Barkhorn, who racked up a mere 301 kills during WWII).

Red Dawn

The Russians are coming!  No really: Russian, Cuban, and Nicaraguan troops invade the United States in the 1980s (the Soviet Union was apparently fairly desperate because of bad wheat crops), with Russian and Cuban paratroopers being dropped in the middle of the U.S., occupying several states (including Colorado, where the movie is set).  A group of teenagers, arming themselves with whatever they can find, form a guerrilla group known as the "Wolverines" (after their high school mascot) and, with the help of a Colonel from the Air Force (who was rescued by the teens after his F-15 was shot down), attack the occupying forces, avenging family members and friends who were killed.

While by no means a bad movie, Red Dawn isn't particularly good, either.  The acting is decent enough (Patrick Swayze stars, and Charlie Sheen also appears), and the battle sequences are excellent (rumor has it that a mock T-72 tank used in the film was so accurate that the CIA became suspicious), but the basic concept seems rather preposterous.  The best thing about the movie is probably the alternate history discussions it has inspired (including a big thread on one forum where people make up stories about what they did during the time of the movie).  Overall, the film is enjoyable enough (as are many stupid movies), and earns its status as a cult classic (although just barely).

Written by John Milius, the basic plot (Russian paratroopers dropped from transports disguised as civilian airliners) was used again in the game Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (which features several shout-outs to this movie).  The video game Homefront (also scripted by Milius) and its companion novel feature a similar plot (North Korea invades the U.S. this time).  Also of note: this was the first film to be released with a PG-13 rating (which was introduced the year this film came out - 1984), although it was not the first movie to actually receive the new rating (that "honor" would go to The Flamingo Kid).  If you like war movies, action flicks, Patrick Swayze, or really, really corny plots, you'll love Red Dawn.

Rating: 70/100

Red Dawn: Background Information

The film takes place during "World War III" (even though it's just the USSR, Cuba, and Nicaragua fighting against the U.S., U.K. and China - most of Europe decided to sit this war out, and little is said about Asia [including the Middle East] or South America or Australia).  They use a couple of nukes against the U.S. and China (I think they destroy a couple missile depots, D.C., and maybe Beijing), and drop paratroopers in the American midwest (including Colorado, where the movie is set), occupying several states (including Alaska and Texas) as well as part of western Canada and all of Mexico.  At the beginning of the movie, background information tells us that most of Europe pulled out of NATO (the U.K. being the major exception), a communist coup overthrew the Mexican government, the Warsaw Pact expanded its sphere of influence (to where, I'm not sure), and the Ukrainian wheat harvest failed.  The U.S. is now strategically isolated (except for the U.K. and, for some reason, China [no word on Japan, South Korea, Israel, or some of our other good buddies]).  Someone took the time to make a map of the world in Red Dawn, which is pretty helpful.  There's also a big expanded universe discussion board (although you must be a member of the site to see the board).  Oh, and there's a remake of the movie (featuring North Korean villains) coming out soon (it got pushed back to remove references to China being the invader).

Random Ranting: PG-13

I'm not a big fan of the PG-13 rating.  (WARNING: uncontrollable ranting ahead)  While it originally was actually useful (and didn't cheapen the PG rating), it eventually became too "tame."  Like the PG rating, you could initially have multiple instances of "f--k," nudity (including breasts), and graphic violence (after 1984, a few PG-rated films were released with nudity or f-words, but this quickly stopped).  Now, most summer blockbusters are rated PG-13, and are very watered-down, with the PG rating almost being decried as too juvenile.  Thankfully, the PG rating is getting fixed so as to be less childish (you can now show boobies in an educational context, and you can even say "s--t" again [but nothing stronger]), and there is the occasional PG-13 film that will contain content that actually justifies the rating.  So, maybe there is hope for the ratings board.

Our Idiot Brother

"Nothing like two dudes and a dog making candles."  It's a shame that Paul Rudd isn't a star on the level of Jonah Hill or Seth Rogen - he's a really great actor, as this film clearly points out.  Funny, fresh, and - most importantly - extremely upbeat, Our Idiot Brother is one of those films that keeps you smiling throughout, without being enormously cliched or heavy-handed.  You find yourself rooting for the main character right away, since he's just an awesome guy who's in some not-so-awesome situations.  For God's sake, he gets thrown in jail because he sells pot to a police officer.  And he knows the guy is a cop - he's in full uniform!  And then he gets released from jail early because he was such a swell guy.  That's the kind of movie this is - a really sweet film.  Rudd means well, and he helps his sisters in his own special way - even if they don't know that he's really helping.

Rating: 92/100

Kill Bill

Undoubtedly Quentin Tarantino's most action-packed film, Kill Bill retains the director's unmistakable dialogue-heavy, heavily homaged style that is seen in his other films.  Perhaps Tarantino's most "conventional" film, Kill Bill is a two-part story dealing with the revenge of a bride who lost her groom to her former boss.  Armed with a samurai sword, she goes on a roaring rampage of revenge, taking down the people who killed her groom and family, one by one, until she reaches the head honcho: the titular Bill.  A love letter to action films (especially martial arts films), Kill Bill works on two levels (as do most of Tarantino's other films): on one level, it is a conventional action film, while on the other hand, it is artistic in a way (thanks to its heavy use of homage).
Split into two parts (Volumes 1 and 2) because of its length, Tarantino hopes to make a complete version by re-combining both parts with some additional footage.  It should be noted that the American release of Volume 1 features the climatic fight scene in black and white; this was done to avoid an NC-17 rating, as the scene is extremely violent and gory.
Pulp Fiction it ain't, but there is really no way that ANYONE can really make a better movie than that one; still, Kill Bill comes pretty damn close.  It should also be noted (as my father reminded me) that both Kill Bill and Pulp Fiction are told in a non-linear style (the former features a number of flashbacks, while the latter simply shows events out of order).

Rating: 90/100

We Bought a Zoo

I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!!!  Not many good, flat-out family movies get released anymore.  Most "family" movies today are either really, really juvenile or seem to be aimed more at adults (the latter of which, thankfully, is more common).  We Bought a Zoo harkens back to the days when family movies were for the WHOLE family.  There's no sneaky adult content (most of the "offensive" content is just a few stronger profanities), it's an inspiring story, and everyone can enjoy it.  Oh, and it is based on a true story.  We need more movies like this.

Rating: 85/100

Battleship

There are movies based on books.  There are movies based on comics.  There are movies based on television shows.  There are movies based on action figures.  And now... there's this: a movie based on a board game.  Yeah...  Somehow, it's not as bad as one would think.  It's not a very good movie, but it's okay.  Good action scenes, great special effects, and "stupid aliens" (my father's words) make for a reasonable way to spend two hours.  The movie remains sort of faithful to the board game, but does its own thing.  Also, it shows just how badass military veterans can be (even if they're old enough to have served in World War II), especially in the face of an alien invasion.  Also also, it's nice to see a movie where the aliens aren't immune to conventional weaponry (even a couple of cruise missiles or some five inch cannon rounds can take down a massive alien ship, and 20 mm rounds can shoot down smaller projectiles).  For a summer blockbuster, this one is just like the majority: dumb fun.

Rating: 70/100

Youth in Revolt

"In the movies the good guy gets the girl.  In real life it's usually the prick."  Are you a nice guy, who has always dreamed of just being a complete asshole sometimes?  That's the whole point of this movie: Michael Cera gets to play the nice guy AND the dick that is somehow irresistible to women.  And it's the same character, but they're different characters!  It's a little confusing, but very funny.  The most notable feature is the excellent cast, which includes Cera, Steve Buscemi, Zach Galifianakis, and Fred Willard.  A great little gem, this is actually based on a book of the same name by C.D. Payne.

Rating: 91/100

Team America: World Police

"Remember, there is no 'I' in Team America."  "Yes, there is."  From the creators of South Park, we get... this.  It's a puppet movie... for adults.  And the puppets all have deliberately crappy motion (because, y'know, they're freakin' puppets) and little puppet clothes and weapons and everything.  And they have to stop a puppet of Kim Jong-il (R.I.P., little one) from doing... something terrible to the puppet world (which in this case is the real world, just with puppets).  Do you think I'm overdoing the whole puppet thing?  Anyways, it's rude, it's crude, but it's hilarious.  EVERYTHING is hilarious.  And, much like South Park, there is a valuable lesson to be learned (which conservatives seem to really like).  Not for the faint of heart.

Rating: 76/100

Transformers

"One shall stand, one shall fall." An update of the classic 1980s cartoon, Michael Bay's big-screen interpretation of the franchise gets a lot of things right. For starters, Peter Cullen (who voiced Autobot leader Optimus Prime, as well as Ironhide, in the original cartoon) returns to bring Prime to life for a new generation of fans. In addition, the characters are mostly ones from the original show, and retain many of the personality traits that made them so distinct (Starscream is a traitorous jet, Ratchet is the medic, etc.), and the classic transformation sound is reused. But enough with nostaglgia; let's get on with the review.
Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is your ordinary teenaged boy, living in a suburban home with Mom, Dad, and Mojo (his dog). One day, he gets a car. Turns out, this is no ordinary car, but rather Bumblebee, an Autobot who has been assigned to protect Sam, because the Decepticons want him - dead or alive.  Cue everything blowing up (it IS a Michael Bay movie, after all).  Good fun, and a great way to spend a couple of hours.

Rating: 90/100

Grease

Grease is an awesome movie.  It's one of those rare musicals that actually translates extremely well for adults (and by that, I mean that Grease is NOT a juvenile movie).  Based on an extremely raunchy stage play that became a massive hit on Broadway, Grease generally follows the path of standard musical romance movies, but actually deals with what the men in the stories really want: sex.  I know I'm being blunt here, but that's what Grease really is about: sex, sex, and sex.  With song lyrics like "you know that I ain't braggin'/she's a real pussy wagon" ("Greased Lightning"), you can't mistake it for anything else.  This is also one of the few movies that actually deals with real issues in high school (notably teen pregnancy).  Often thought of as a kiddie flick (when it really is anything but), Grease is probably my favorite musical of all time, beating out the remake of Hairspray by a wide margin (and I really liked Hairspray).

Rating: 87/100

Wonder Woman

I liked this movie, even though I barely know anything about Wonder Woman (or most superheroes, for that matter - I don't tend to read comic books).  It's good, however, to see a superhero movie that's not too juvenile (like the Spider-man films) and actually involves someone who has superpowers (unlike Batman or Iron Man).  The animation of the movie is superb (although the F-22s at the beginning of the movie, while recognizable, are poorly done), and the voice acting is of a high quality.  I actually was able to get into the movie quite readily, in spite of having little prior knowledge of any of the characters.  However, in spite of the relative ease of viewing for non-fans, I'm sure that hardcore fans will find stuff in here that will keep them watching.  If you have the time, give this one a look.

Rating: 80/100

The Notebook

"What happens if a car comes?"  "We die."  I like this movie.  I don't care what people may say, I like this movie (for the record, I'm a straight male).  I don't understand what other guys don't like about this movie - it's very charming, and quite steamy at times (don't get too excited though, you pervs).  While there have been many romantic films before The Notebook (and many since), what makes The Notebook so special is its simplicity, and the chemistry between its leading players.  No plot description is needed - this story has been done millions of times through the ages.  As cliched as it is, The Notebook is still an excellent movie, and should be required viewing for everyone in a romantic relationship (or wishing to be in one).

Rating: 95/100

Mystery Team

"If life was fair, I would have gotten a new bike for my birthday instead of that stupid car!"  Oh, what to say about Mystery Team?  The best way to sum it up would be to say that it's like Encyclopedia Brown, The Hardy Boys, or "Scooby-Doo," but for adults.  Basic premise is that three childish teenagers (I think they're just about to graduate from high school) have been running a detective agency since they were little kids.  Back then, everyone thought it was cute.  Now, they just think it's stupid.  They'll take on any case for a nickel, they don't swear, drive, do drugs, etc., ride their bikes everywhere, and drink chocolate milk.  Anyways, one day a little girl comes to them and asks them to solve a mystery.  Turns out, her parents were MURDERED.  The team decides to take on the case, believing that it will give them greater credibility.  Although the film relies on a good deal of crude humor, it's still funny.  Kids would probably appreciate it even more (although the movie is explicitly for teens and adults).  A good watch if you want something decent to occupy your time, but there are better films out there.

Rating: 71/100

The Dictator

Not Sacha Baron Cohen's finest effort, but then again, it's virtually impossible to top Borat.  Still, The Dictator is insanely funny (at least for those who are not easily offended), and offers very sharp political satire, particularly about democracy.  Unlike Cohen's previous efforts, The Dictator takes the form of a plot-driven narrative instead of a mockumentary, following Admiral General Hafez Aladeen, the dictator of the North African Republic of Wadiya.  When traveling to New York to make a speech at the U.N. on his country's nuclear capabilities (note: when attacking Israel with nuclear missiles, the warhead must be pointy so that the victims don't think that a giant dildo is flying towards them), he is kidnapped, and then rescued by a kindly hippie.  Aladeen then conspires with his former nuclear director (who was to be executed) to return to power, and prevent his idiotic body double from signing a treaty that would turn Wadiya into a democracy.  Hilarity ensues.

Rating: 90/100